Thursday 14 May 2009

End

This is the end,
My only friend - The End.

The joy and elation of Eleventh and Twelfth seem far off and hazy now. Those were the days when people were actually overjoyed. Ecstatic as they were, celebrations were wild and varied (and weird) and complete. I saw people take immense pleasure in simply catching up with those lost hours with dear old Morpheus. I saw people play 'Condition Zero' without some twelve hours without break. And when I saw people running through the library (some sort of a victory lap) with the sole motive of disturbing others in the house of knowledge, I realized that I had seen everything! But those phantasmagorical (parrdon its frequent usage, Dela) times seem a distant history.

It seems to date back to as far as the day when a certain Chronotron came to my humble abode in Chennai asking for advice for filling his JEE form, as far back as the day we designed the first WONA teaser for the first yearites' recruitment, as far back as Thomso - when it was happening and maybe even the time when I had just joined the insti. Two years,I have spent here and it already feels a lifetime. R-Land feels too dear and I shall forever regret leaving it when my time comes. Why, I regret leaving it even now, even for these two months... though home seems to be an inviting prospective. Holidays may be fun but it is only for that much time. Later, the drab humdrum of life sets in gouging out that last ounce of excitement and rendering even those fun moments useless. In other words, to me, holidays are a harbinger of boredom.

I put my act together this time however, to fight this boredom. I shall not succumb! Part of my preparation included getting as many movies as possible from the Velociraptor's infinite collection of movies (1 TB is infinite enough for me). One last time, I dragged my lappy along to visit the Farmhouse. A few hung moments later, my computers 160 GB were full and yet... I felt so empty. It was only then dawning upon me that this separation was not just temporary.

As a silent watcher of the scrabble game in which 'Granule' was the greatest word (though the points didn't say a similar story), I silently reflected upon the times bygone. Happy days when I was still carefree, when I didn't think such a time would come.... These holidays aren't as simple as the end of college or a summer break.

When I started packing for my Spicejet trip back home, I noticed the words etched on my trunk - ANIRUDH ARUN - 070607 - BTech Metallurgy. I still remember that day - like it was only yesterday. Like I have only just entered my sophomore year. Time is strange and time is cruel. Things of the distant past seem so near and yet, things just bygone seems eons ago! A discussion about the various developments in the literary world with the Lord, the Chronotron, Master Lefty, the Infidel, the PiSRA and the Complex-Analyst later, we decided it was time to leave. As I left, the only words I had were, "Bye Lefty. See you in November." So simple the words, yet so heavy they felt! A warm handshake with Lefty and a hug from Rapu later, I was off for S7.

Had I been alone then, the story might have been considerably different. By no means am I soft and mushy at heart but this was something else. I did not know these people as well as I ought to have known, and yet the burden of separation was so profound. The Exodus has come.

It set me thinking about the one year which lay between now and the time when we'd have to part with another beloved batch... There were no signs of rain but Petrichor penetrated every corner. Had it not been for the comrades who shared that walk along with me, the droplets would have fallen.

Time is cruel, as I've already said. Wonderful times pass by in a jiffy and bad hours simly crawl by... But Time is a healer and most importantly, Time goes on... Time doesn't wait for any one. (as Lezz and Hari Haran seem to have so aptly put it) We get our chances just once and its only just that we take them then and there. I've already felt like I've lost so much... So many opportunities... Yet, nothing.

But then again, opportunities take many forms. If not this, then maybe something else. So, I await the test of time. These holidays may very well turn out to be great. For one thing, I've got an intern - my first. I really hope that I like it. As for the other things I await, the UCL finals (even after those shattered dreams, third time in a row) and more importantly, the FA Cup. IPL seems to be a time-filler of sorts finally, though it has clearly flattered to decieve. With hopes for good times ahead and with an inventory of some cult classics, I hope to fight boredom and conquer that elusive 'enjoyable holidays'.

But for that, I really need to get some sleep. And catch the bus tomorrow at eight. So, adieu Roorkee. Au revoir, fourth years. Catch you in a couple of months, the remaining of you lot. Cheerio.

Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end.

But maybe this end isn't going to be so sad after all.

Tuesday 5 May 2009

Zeitgeist

The last couple weeks have been quite phenomenal and unlike any of those three previous couples preceding the ominous end sems. For the first time during my tenure in R, I introduced myself to the 500 odd pages of study material well within the last one week. There have always been a few things I relish before the exams, simply because they provide that much needed break from monotony; that cushion against madness. For one, I have always loved those minutes in front of the mirror with a razor in hand, humming away 'November Rain' a day before the exams... The other thing, I have never failed to do is - posting, a day or two before the exams.

This time neither happened. I have, only now, typed out a post about the 'spirit of the time', just after getting rid of a week of stubble. All this, after two exams have passed! The semester has whizzed past at a breakneck pace and the past two weeks, perhaps even faster. Goodbyes were said and people took their final bows even as they braced themselves for a whole new journey... far away from R. Yet again, I realized how dear those old friendships are even as I saw that newer ties had blosommed and bloomed. A handful of photoshoots and some 200 photos later, we emerged, dazed by the flash. I have managed to pose in every weird way thinkable (and some unthinkable, courtesy Prondi). All the time, the second issue of the semester was developing into a twenty-pager and I hardly found time for anything else. Pressed, though I was, these have been some of the most beautiful days of my life. And I wish time would move a lot slower as I don't want to give up so much... so soon.

A TOC interview (in which Jetty, god alone knows how, rocked), some more chapos (you tend to get bored of them), Arth, an ex-chairman of WatchOut and lot more work have really left me out of breath. So much so, that the usual 'I really need to study now!' was replaced by 'Yaar, it's too late now; not much I can do anyway... Let's sleep.' With Facebook and GTalk permeating every nook and cranny of my life, even though I like neither of them, things have become even harder, if that was possible.

Two exams gone and five to go before its all over. Albeit the end of days continues to haunt me, I reflect upon how it has been so far. Nanotech was a clear 'No, no brain-er', though I had to pool in ideas with Jetty in order to bring out more comprehensive answers. However todays paper was, well... Par excellence. After a long time, a JEE style paper had me K.O'd. The last time, I scraped through. I'm not too sure about what is in for me this time around.

Having less time to study, courtesy WONA, and chosing to sleep during the time I had, I got up at first light today to realize that I knew next to nothing. Meticulously, I began improving my chances through the 'Store' function of my Casio 991-MS. Bravely, I entered the exam hall with some 47 odd pairs of eyes staring at me. I was late. As soon as I got seated, my usually impeccably superfoccused mind refused to cooperate! 'Dream On' and 'Comfortably Numb' looped some 4 times in my mind (apiece) after which I had the urge to study the frequency of the fan overhead... After some serious mind - focussing, I began unravelling the mysteries of Thermo using pen, paper and CalC when disaster struck. I pressed some thing I ought not have pressed! And soon, five of my stored variables read the same - 42! The answer to life, the universe and everything else? I doubt the prof will understand it, but I had no choice. Three hours later, it was heartening to see that everyone had messed their papers! Hope still lives on...

P.S. Everyone has been finding it strange; a change - they say, they see (saw, whatever). And accusations of a Kondy 2.0 have been brought about. Let me assure you here, ladies and gentlemen, that nothing has really changed.

P.P.S. Another reason why the last two weeks have been quite different; one to be happy about finally - HHH posted once. Only once.